One of the things we ‘free believers’ hear often from those who still faithfully attend an IC is, "Well, you don’t want to just throw the baby out with the bath water." The implied meaning may vary from "Do you really have to be so extreme?" to "Your leaving organized church is the same as leaving the Lord" to "Are you sure you aren’t getting into some New Age religion?"
Our family is considering moving to a place closer to town, so have begun casually looking. We want a fixer-upper, not a new home. So last weekend we were shown … let’s just say, a REAL fixer upper.
This house was once beautiful, but had been so badly neglected for many years that only someone with lots of money and time to invest would want to try and salvage it. The cost of repairing this house to full functionality would far exceed any market price of the house itself. It just wouldn’t be practical for a busy family with modest means to take the time, money and labor to try and restore this house.
I sighed with regret, seeing the beautiful hardwood floors still in great shape in some of the rooms, the large windows, the huge living area, the brick fireplace in the bedroom. There was so much personality and history to this place. Yet there was the old, leaky roof; the serious foundation issues obvious in the floor, the laundry porch literally falling off of the house, the large lawn completely overtaken by weeds, the falling-down carport loaded with junk. Worst of all, there was a large split between the two halves of the house in the roof, and the brick wall on one side had completely pulled away from the roof! It COULD possibly be salvaged, but much of it would still have to be torn down and replaced. I’m often one for trying to save things. I love old homes; we live in one now. Yet I could see it would make more sense to just tear that place down and build a new one.
Many "free believers" have found that trying to salvage the situation at the institutions we’ve been in is more than we, or our families, can really afford. We gave them our time, our money, our efforts, our hearts, our children. We were told that we’d "reap a harvest" by "sowing" as they specified. It didn’t happen as they said. We became more and more tired, drained, and discouraged as time went on.
We sat under some of the better pastors out there, I believe. I really can’t pin the fault on anyone, nor do I want to. I believe the primary issue was with the system, rather than the hearts of the people inside of it. We were trying to build on, or even salvage, a ‘house’ with serious structural flaws.
Darin Hufford wrote a blog that distinguished what the bottom line misunderstanding often is. People tend to see the institution as the baby. That’s why they worry that we are throwing the baby out with the bath water. But really, Jesus is the ‘baby,’ and we aren’t throwing him out… he’s with us always. Now we’re just swimming in a different place ... now it’s more like a river than a bathtub.
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13 comments:
Great blog as always, Amy. You've expressed it beautifully and I love the pictures.
Godspeed to your house hunt.
Best to you and all your house.
Thanks again for sharing your journey, awesome point about the true identity of the Baby
ps. hey Aida, be talking to ya soon I expect... tee hee...
Amy, I hope you find a new house soon. I think it's a good idea for your family to move closer to town. I think you'll like it better. Keep me posted as to how it goes.
Hey, Leonard! I haven't gotten it yet. Hopefully today. Tomorrow starts my spring break and I'll also be off next week so that'll give me time to figure out how it works although your instructions were excellent.
Hey Aida and Leonard, it's funny how I drew this comparison almost immediately. For a long time I had great sentimental attatchment to "in the building church." I still have pictures and ornamental church house decorations in my home. I wish it COULD be fixed. To be honest I prefer some structure which I now don't have. Time will tell...
Anyway, thanks :-) We'll see if Father has another place for us. Part of me doesn't want to leave, but driving back & forth is wearing...
Amy,
Great post! Indeed, I have seen some who have left the System, a move to throw the Baby out with the Bathwater, in everything "seemed" as Religious, when really it isn't. Most importantly, I see harsh words being thrown at the PEOPLE themselves within the System, which truly is not of Love. The people are our brothers and sisters in Christ. They are valuable, loved and I love them too. My heart aches for those still in the System, whether they are working within it (leadership, staff) or attending it. My deepest prayer always is that more and more will listen to the Holy Spirit inviting them out into Freedom. The people, no matter if they are defending the System or not...I desire them to not only see the Truth, but step into it, leaving Religiosity behind.
We do no favor nor good when we bash (even subtle or direct) the people within the System. The System itself is what is soured and damaging.
I love what you said here: "But really, Jesus is the ‘baby,’ and we aren’t throwing him out… he’s with us always. Now we’re just swimming in a different place ... now it’s more like a river than a bathtub."
Amen! We as Christ-followers, Jesus is our Love. It is so important for those who have/will leave the System to separate Jesus Christ from Religion. The two are fully opposite of one another. I sigh when I hear my fellow siblings confusing that which is of Religiosity with Christ. My deepest prayer is that they will never give-up on Jesus, but see the System as that which is not of God.
Blessings,
~Amy :)
I agree. I find that while I am still sorting through my own "baby and bathwater" issues, it sometimes helps and sometimes hurts to hear others express their "religious" ideas. Just yesterday, I went to lunch with some coworkers and the conversation turned to tithing...and how someone had been "blessed" because of it. I shuddered inside, but resolved to keep my thoughts to myself for sake of argument. These are people I love, after all, and whether we agree or disagree is not the issue. I will continue to follow my heart...and pray for us all that Father will continue to draw us to Him.
Amy, I agree... one hope and prayer I have is that we would be able to make more connections with people still 'in church,' that we can be friends without either of us judging or even worrying that the other is 'gone astray.' That we can focus on what we agree on, not what we don't.
Carolyn, I hear you... I think Father blesses us according to our place of understanding. He may have blessed her for tithing because she was doing what she had been taught is right. I've done some things that I see the error in now, but Father still blessed me I think because he knew I was trying to do what I understood to be right. I'm just glad to be free from that "godfather" mentality now though, aren't you :-)
Indeed, that Father would continue to draw us to Himself...
Amy and Amy, I love what you've both said here.
None of us is going to agree perfectly. If we do, I believe someone isn't being honest. So, let's try to focus on those areas where we do agree and continue to love and accept each other in spite of those places where we disagree.
Amy - A post which very well resonates with me. Your analogy was great! Thank you!
Thank you all for your feedback. Sometimes, I have these thoughts and wonder "is this going to make sense to another living person, or do I just think too much?" I really appreciate all of you, and enjoy your blogs as well. I learn a lot and also have "aha" moments.
Blessings to all of you!
Hey Lionwoman,
I appreciate this post and your position on who the Baby is. Couldn't agree more. Thanks for dropping by my place today (With Unveiled Face). I appreciate your encouragement. I've seen you around a bunch, but just noticed from your profile that you're also a homeschooler, and from Texas. We have those 2 things in common. I'll have to come by here more often. I'm wondering what part of Texas? You can find my email on my own profile and let me know, if you're comfortable doing so. It'd be neat if we were close.
Hi Free Spirit, glad you stopped by! I looked but couldn't find your email, though it's probably right under my nose. If you want, you can email Aida and tell her I said it's OK to give you my email :-). Indeed it would be great if we were close, but TX is a big place :-)
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